The new 'diet' pills I'm on (really, they're a herbal fat burner/metabolism booster/appetite suppressant) consist of bitter orange extract, yerba mate extract, green tea extract, cayenne pepper and ginger. All natural ingredients and they really work!
Oh, one caveat: "Take with food."
Which I do faithfully every morning, two pills after my bran flakes and skim milk. Except for this morning, when I didn't feel hungry enough for breakfast but wanted to take the pills anyway. I considered it kind of an experiment.
Which backfired about five minutes after I'd swallowed them.
Suddenly I started feeling nauseous. I must've looked a little green because Lena started to watch me very closely as I swallowed and breathed deeply. Stay calm, take deep breaths, maybe a glass of water will make you feel better, I thought to myself. As I walked toward the cupboard to get a glass, I felt it happening...!
Ran to the bathroom, made it just in the nick of time. Blaaaarghhh.
Ever wondered what bitter orange extract and cayenne pepper feel like on the way back up? Imagine the bitterest thing you've ever tasted, bitter to the nth degree, mixed with the burning death of pure cayenne. Then imagine that mixed with stomach acid, scraping its way back up your esophagus.
I felt like I was literally breathing fire.
The taste of bitterness made the gagging worse, but the fiery hot agony going on in my throat had me trying to suppress that instinct. It was a nightmare! Lena, the dear sweet wonderful angel, brought me a cold water bottle.
So yet one more lesson learned the hard way. "Take with food." Got it.
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