Visit with Amie

My friend Amie came over today with her girls, we had so much fun! First we headed to the Fox Run hill for some sledding. Lena and Ryder got to use their new GTs, man those things are wicked! Good job, Levi and Amber, the kids love them. Amie's girls and my big boys tried them out, too. Way cool. Even Amie and I got on the big black sled and took a few runs (and omg was THAT hilarious). Then we came back to our house for some pizza and chips and caesar salad and pop and chocolates. Oh, and we had a Kinect party! Amie got her girls an Xbox Kinect and some games for Christmas, so they brought them out; they had Wipeout (the tv show game), Twister Party, Dance Central 2, and the Black Eyed Peas dance game. Added to our Kinect Adventures, Dance Central 1, Kinect Disneyland, and Kinectimals. Amie and I delighted in embarrassing our kids with our lame dance moves, and her girls kicked everyone's butts at the Twister game. Even my boys got into the spirit of it all, which I thought they might lame out and just sit on the couch, uncomfortable with goofing around like that in front of her cute girls. Amie's littlest one, Izzy (who is 7), was a dancing queen at Dance Central, and Lena wowed us all at how good she was at Kinect Adventures. 


F-U-N!!!

Lena's gymnastics show

(Sorry guys, I just noticed that whenever I zoom in or out, the sound cuts off. Stupid camera!)

This white girl can't dance

An early-morning call from Mom inspired me to get my butt in motion this morning, so there I was, downstairs in front of the giant tv, sweatin' my butt off to Shaun T's HipHop Abs Fat-Burning Cardio routine. And ohhhh man, I am so uncoordinated, its not even funny!

Trying to do the tuck/tilt/breathe while bouncing around, arms pumping, moving side to side. I could barely coordinate my arms and legs just doing the basic march-step. Every once in a while I'd catch my reflection in the china cabinet glass doors and just shudder.

This white girl can't dance.

(BUT-- I can sweat, a lot, and afterwards felt great so I know it was a good workout.)

There's dedication, and then there's just plain insanity

I was in Red Deer today and the weather was just miserable. Raining, cold, wet, windy... just UGH. But I kept noticing all these people, dressed in their black spandex running pants, jogging together in packs of three or more. JOGGING. In the rain.

And it wasn't just one group of runners, or two. No, I must have seen about six or seven of these groups of 'dedicated' runners, just slogging along in the cold and wet. And not just in one part of Red Deer; I saw them in Bower, over by Michener, downtown.

I'm thinking there must be a biathlon coming up and these crazies are participants, or maybe part of a running group? But I mean, c'mon: there's dedication and then there's obsession.

INSANITY is what I call it.

I'll take my home workouts over that any day.

I Love my Husband (and Kayaking)

Tyler and I went out on the lake kayaking last night. It was my very first time on a kayak, I was very nervous about tipping but once I found my center of gravity, I was fine. Took me about five minutes of wobbling and gasping and frantic paddling, but I got it. Then another five minutes to figure out how to use the paddle efficiently (read: not dousing myself with water every stroke) so I could keep up with Tyler. But boy, did I ever wow that husband of mine when I zipped right past him and he couldn't keep up! Haha.

We had a truly wonderful time. Started out on the far east side of the lake, Petro Beach I think its called; paddled into the reedy area and saw a mama duck with her babies. Ty was of course looking for schools of perch, no luck. Then we cruised along the shore, looking at all the cool houses and cabins and mini-mansions. On a side note, how lovely would it be to own property down there, your own personal private beach with sand and all that water right at your backdoor. We chuckled with evil glee at all the bird poop on the boats docked in the water, especially to see the black protective coverings just covered with white streaks.

Interrupted a young couple's canoodling when we drifted by, they frantically put their clothes back on and hustled away, har har har. We had a little race, and by 'little' I mean a full-on frantic mad dash to the finish line. Which I won, of course. Ty attributed it to my "much faster" kayak, but come on, we all know it was due to my awesome arm muscles, haha.

My kayak kept having a tendency to crash into Tyler's, and honestly I wasn't even trying to do it. Every time we tried to paddle nicely beside each other I would somehow end up bumping into the side of him. In retaliation, he thought it would be downright hilarious to try to tip my kayak by pushing mine with his oar or grabbing the end rope handle and shaking me around. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't tip me. Revenge was sweet when I did the same to him and he almost DID tip, teetering back and forth, madly trying to regain his balance. Muahaha!

We floated side by side and watched the sun set, it was glorious and romantic and just simply heaven. The sun was a brilliant red and set in a matter of minutes, and just as the last rays reached us he grabbed my kayak, pulled me closer and kissed me. *sigh* What a man!

On our way back to shore, of all things a bagpipe started playing. And not from a radio or recording, someone was actually on the beach playing a bagpipe. It was cool for the first five minutes, listening to the haunting music as we paddled, but after ten minutes, then twenty, all we wanted to do was find that damn bagpiper and fill his instrument with sand! Finally we floated by the musician, only to see he was playing to an audience. A group of people were sitting around a fire listening, but it was hilarious, you could tell they were thinking, 'Ohmygod, when is it ever going to end??' It was truly painful. High-pitched squees and tribbles (that's what I call them, ha), going on forever and ever and ever. My eardrums almost exploded. We were never so happy as to reach shore and quickly pack up and get out of there.

I am definitely in love with kayaking, though. We can't wait to get out again, next time maybe we'll go to Kuusamo Beach, now that I'm considered capable enough to handle the kayak without tipping myself. The water is much deeper there. So ya, that was our version of a wonderful romantic evening. We're the Kayaking Kashas!

10 Minute Trainer with Tony Horton

Have you heard about this? Its my new obsession: I need it, I want it, I simply MUST get it.

Dr. Oz's Ultimate Diet Plan

I am in no way a huge Dr. Oz fan, so don't take this post to mean I have a secret crush or that I watch his show religiously. He's no Adam Lambert! And actually, a lot of things about Dr. Oz and his show irk me, such as the way he talks and his stupid demonstrations, etc. A life-size model of a nose just to demonstrate why your nose drips? Ewww, no thanks. So its kind of annoying that his shows are usually about topics that I actually find interesting and want the answers to (such as Top 5 Cancer Symptoms, Best Skin Secrets, etc), because that means I have to sit and watch!

So last night's episode was all about, you guessed it, his diet plan for America. I sat there through the entire episode just so I could write all the info down and share it with y'all. I suffered, all for you! You're welcome.

1) Its not about your weight, its about your waist size. A person's waist size should be, at most, half the size of their height. So a person who is 5'3 (me) should have a maximum waist size of 37". Phew! (A couple months ago I wouldn't have been able to say that.)

2) There are 5 foods that make you fat:

• Simple Sugars and Syrups (#1 & #2), such as soda and jam. Anything that says 'syrup' (such as high-fructose corn syrup, which is in A LOT of food items) is out. Replace jam with sliced fresh fruit on toast; replace soda with water.
• White Flour, replace with 100% whole grain.
• Saturated Fats (animal fats), any fat that is solid at room temp, found in many meats. Replace with chicken, salmon and fish.
• Trans-Fats, found in anything labeled 'partially hydrogenated vegetable oil'.

3) Get some new shoes and a pedometer, and get walking!

4) Lose 100 calories from your daily food intake.

5) Automate your meals. This just means its much easier to stick to a healthy diet plan if your daily menu is the same. Breakfast every morning could be a shake made with plain fat-free yogurt, blueberries and flaxseed oil; dinner is a healthy protein, whole grain and lots of vegetables.

6) Cheat your tastebuds. People who eat spices or spicy foods in the morning for breakfast are found to be much less likely to overeat at lunch and dinner. So add hot sauce or peppers to your eggs, have cinnamon and nutmeg on your whole wheat toast, etc. Dr Oz also had the audience do an exercise to demonstrate cheating your tastebuds without using food: lick your lips, then purse your lips and take a deep inhale. Feel the coolness on your lips? Repeat this a few times. Dr Oz says its a simple exercise you can use to reduce food cravings and curb your appetite.

7) Stay accountable and measure up. Take body measurements every week to see what is working and what needs improving.

8) Stress makes you gain weight. People with large bellies, beware! The real danger is when your tummy fat is hard as this means the fat is underneath the muscle, rather than a jiggly tummy where the fat is on the surface. When a person is stressed out, the brain sends chemicals throughout the body that result in the stomach fat hardening. What a person needs to do is break the stress cycle. There is an extract you can get from the Passion Flower that works similar to anti-anxiety medications. Just add a few drops to your water. Also, deep breathing exercises and calming visualizations work (find your happy place, haha).

9) There are 4 fat-burning, muscle-building exercises you can do. Its hard to explain them rather than watch them, so bear with me here (although a few of them have actual names so that helps).

• Stand up, on tiptoes, with your arms held straight out in front of you; cross your arms back and forth, up and down, for up to 2 minutes.
• The Invisible Chair: lean against wall, hands in a prayer position in front of you with fingers splayed, slowly walk your heels out until they are directly under your knees; hold this pose for up to 2 minutes.
• The Rickety Table: On your hands and knees, reach your left arm out straight in front of you as far as you can, stretch right leg out straight behind you. Then bring left elbow and right knee down and together, try to tap them together. Repeat with opposite arm and leg. Do this for up to 2 minutes.
• Laying on your back, knees bent, arms behind head, in the basic sit-up position. Keep ankles and knees together, and lift your legs up off the floor, then bring them down and tap on floor. Do this for, yes, you guessed it, up to 2 minutes.

WLJ: Weigh-in time

Allrighty, here we go...

Weight: down 6 pounds
Chest: down 1 inch
Waist: down 1/2 inch
Hips: down 1.5 inches
Right/Left Thigh: down 1/2 inch each thigh
Right/Left Arm: down 1/2 inch each arm

So that's 6 pounds, 5 inches gone forever. Woohoo!
Workouts: 17 Turbo Jam, one hour of walking/hiking, 30 minutes of Hip Hop Aerobics (which totally sucked and I'll never do that stupid workout again).

Peeve of the Week: Ciggie Butts

We were at the acreage last night, cleaning the 2-mile stretch of ditch that runs from the stop sign at 781 to the crossroads by Earl and Ruby's. Earlier in the week, we'd made arrangements with Levi and Mom (Granny Hag) that we would meet out there Wednesday night to finally get it done. Levi had to cancel due to an unexpected night shift and so we all decided to reschedule.

It was such a beautiful evening though, that Tyler and I loaded up the kids, along with the quad and little trailer, and headed out there. Ty dropped me and the three oldest off right there at the stop sign with our garbage bags and gloves, then he continued on to the acreage with Ryder. Lena, Gunnar, Ardan and I made a fan formation and swept through the ditch like little litter-picking machines. I had the top section by the edge of the road, the protective mother in me coming out I guess. Plus I didn't have to wade through deep grass, haha. The downside?

Cigarette butts.

First off, I was guilty of it myself so I can't judge too harshly. But then again, hell YES I can judge, and curse at, and flat out want to ass-kick those ignorant cusses that huck their butts out the car window. I probably picked up well over 200 butts along that 2-mile stretch. And while that number may not seem that high, picture yourself having to bend over and pick up a tiny white piece of foam buried in gravel and grass. Over 200 times.

By the time we finished the entire north side of the ditch, two and a half hours had passed, dusk was well upon us, my legs, back and arms were aching, and we had six full garbage bags. We had a good time, though. The kids and I walked the ditch until we got to the power plant (whatever that thing is), where Tyler and Ryder were waiting with the quad and trailer. The kids all hopped in the trailer and Tyler pulled them back to the acreage while I continued walking and picking. By the time I made it there they'd all had a nice rest and drink of water, and were ready to carry on. We hadn't planned on doing the full two miles, but then we thought Why not? It was still light enough out, I had tons of energy, and I didn't want to waste the opportunity of having all those sets of helping hands.

For that second-mile stretch Gunnar and I walked, doing the upward slope of the ditch, while Ty rode beside us on the quad with the three youngest in the trailer, and they did the level part of the ditch. Eventually even Gunnar hopped in and then it was just me walking. And picking. Trudging along in my black-and-white polka dot rubber boots, jean capris, black tee, black hat, sunglasses and work gloves. Quite the sight, I'm sure.

I've never been so satisfied with a job well done as I was when we finally finished. Threw my heavy, full bag into the trailer with the kids and hopped on the quad. Ty scooted back so I could drive (copped a feel when the kids weren't looking, niiiice) and we tooted along at a nice slow pace back to the acreage. I was shocked to see the time was 10pm! On the way home past Mac's, we stopped and got our hard-working, deserving kids some screamers. Kids hit the sack immediately, after I made them wash their hands and faces of course!

Here's a small sample of some of the items we collected:

• the bleached-out skull, ribs and vertebrae of a deer, and one furry knee-to-hoof deer leg
• an entire garbage bag of beer and pop cans, juice boxes, beer bottles, and one wine bottle
• giant plastic potting soil bag
• metres of plastic twine
• twisted metal and cables
• fast food containers, drinks, straws, cutlery and bags
• two used condoms, GROSS! (Ardan says "Mom look at this cool thing I found!" and holds up a bright blue slightly-decomposed condom, I shrieked "Drop it in your bag!!!" Gunnar laughed hysterically)
• a CD case, sans CD, of some really lame wannabe-grunge band
• about ten used packets of Arby's ketchup
• pieces of foam
• soggy giant cardboard box
• shredded pieces of tire
• 10+ cigarette packs

And of course, the hundreds upon hundreds of cigarette butts. There was a ton of other miscellaneous stuff, the majority of it plastic. It makes me sad that so many people think nothing of littering, and such random junk too. Like, someone was eating a pudding cup while driving and then just thought, No way I'm waiting to throw this in an actual garbage can, I'll just toss it now! Hey wait a minute, it was probably some school kid hucking it out the bus window, don't you think? Darn brat kids.

But seriously, the cigarette butts. It keeps coming back to that. A smoker thinks nothing of tossing the butt, its so tiny and seemingly insignificant. But that little non-biodegradable piece of foam is full of chemicals and toxins that leach into the soil.

So to any smokers reading this (you know who you are), its time to consider buying a portable travel ashtray to keep in your vehicle. They're cheap, found at most dollar stores. Time to go green, people, time to think about your impact on the world around you.

And to the person who dumped a frickin' ROTTEN DECOMPOSED COW'S HEAD in the ditch, screw you. You are evil. Something is wrong with you, mentally. Screw. You.

(P.S. Figured out the calories burned for this exercise -- using that new website -- 2.5 hours continuous walking at steady pace holding 0-9 pounds, on slight incline through gravel and high grass, repeated bending and grabbing motions: just over 1400 calories burned! NICE)

Turbo Fire: My new MUST HAVE

Here is my new goal: to keep doing Turbo Jam until I'm fit enough for the newest BeachBody exercise videos coming out this summer, called Turbo Fire. Unfortunately, the youtube preview has the embedding disabled by request, so I can't post a vid of it but here's a link. Check it out! Its a series of 12 high-intensity workout videos that have been proven to burn 9x as much fat as regular Turbo Jam workouts, and your body continues to burn fat up to 22 hours after the workout is finished! Can you believe it?

I am so excited and pumped to get those videos. Its around $120 though, ay-yi-yi. Worth it though. Yet one more thing to start saving for.




Oh yeah, I also want ChaLEAN Extreme. Gimme gimme gimme!!

I still got it, baby!

You wouldn't know it to look at me, but I have a talent for sprinting. Not running as in long distances, but sprinting. Readysetgo and I'm off like a shot.

So there we all were, all six, at the park by our house. Gunnar wanted to have a race around the wooden edging surrounding the play area. The kids were surprised when I lined up with them, and gave each other dubious looks. Heh heh heh, I thought, bring it on baby.

Tyler was our caller, "On your mark... get set... GO!!"

Imagine the kids' shock when I shot past them all and they actually had to exert themselves to catch up to me! Gunnar quickly caught up and I shot him an evil grin, Ardan right on our heels. As we rounded the second-last corner, the boys were too busy elbowing each other to notice that I took the inside of the curve. The look on their faces as they realized I was in the lead, again!

At that point, Ardan decided to be a brat and cut across the sand. "Cheater!" I yelled at him. Gunnar took advantage of my distraction and squeaked past me just before we crossed the finish line.

They just couldn't believe it! I had almost won! And of course I just had to gloat that their 30 year old MOM kicked their boyish asses. So yeah, I think their opinion of me just shot wayyy up.

Bye-bye birdie!**

A very wise lady gave me some advice the other day; she said to stop obsessing over pounds lost, to instead focus on inches lost and how clothes are fitting. So I listened to her and put away the scale. (At least until my monthly weigh-in on the 21st.)

Because it was getting bad, people. Weighing myself up to three times a day, hoping the numbers would be in my favor, which they never were. Even though I'm doing an hour workout every day and eating fairly healthy. So it was incredibly frustrating and frankly, I was getting depressed about it!

But the other day I noticed something that gave me hope and just flat-out astounded me. I no longer have my "chicken cutlets"! Do you know what that is? Most women with large breasts have them -- the fatty little roll ("cutlet") under the armpit. The bigger the breasts, the bigger the cutlet. When I had my breast reduction back in 2000, the doctor informed me I would need a second surgery to remove those fat deposits. I never did get that done and so for the last 10 years I've had my these two lovely chicken cutlets.

But now they're gone! How incredible is that? I am so thrilled.

So yeah, I may not have lost any actual pounds yet, but obviously something is going on in my body thanks to all that exercising. Woohoo!

**Because a chicken's a bird, get it?

Turbo Jammin'!

Soooo excited! My Turbo Jam DVD came yesterday! I got the weighted gloves too. Did the Learn & Burn workout this morning before the kids woke up, then the 20 Minute workout after they'd left for school.

Wow. Good thing I'm somewhat used to a cardio workout, from the Wii, because it was pretty intense. But super-fun! I made it through the 20 Minute workout, only flubbed a few times when the quick-change of combination moves confused me until I studied what they were doing so I could repeat it.

And I can definitely see how a person's abs get sculpted because you are working them the entire time. Can't wait til tomorrow's workout!

Wow, I guess dieting & exercise really do work

I am now entering week two of my WLJ and its going pretty good. I've already dropped 7 pounds and I can feel that my shirts are a bit looser around the waist. Yay! I've been drinking water like its going out of style, at least 10 glasses a day, usually more. Been pretty good about the diet as well; choosing healthy, nutritious foods low in calories and watching my portions. I have a food/exercise journal where I keep track of everything religiously, from calories consumed and burned, to water intake; even writing down moments where I want to want to binge, what I'm craving, and why I'm feeling that way (boredom, stress, etc).

When I started this WLJ I was just planning on doing it all casual-like. Do my workout and eat less. But I realized after the first few days that in order for me to really see results and stick with the program, I'm going to have to fully immerse myself in this new lifestyle. I'm not the type of person who can just eat whatever, as long as its healthy, day to day and just be content with that. I mean, yes, I have done that in the past and maybe lost ten pounds, but then I get bored and start eating 'normal' again and back comes the weight. So I need to be a little obsessive about it I guess, plan out what I'm going to eat, how many calories that will be. If I can see on paper what I'm doing, it helps keep me committed to the WLJ.

Also, when you know exactly how many calories you've already consumed and how many you have left for the day, and you know exactly how many calories were burned during the workout, you are FAR less likely to let yourself cheat a bit with a cookie here or bit of ice cream there. I understand now how my BFF Christine was able to refuse gravy, pie and all that yummy stuff over the holidays.

I did cheat though, the other night. Ty had been called to work earlier that day, sent up north to Slave Lake for two days, so I was all alone that night. The kids were all in bed, I was at the computer killing time, and I had the thought, There are Reese peanut butter cups in the cupboard. Of course, for the next ten minutes that's all I could think about, obsess about. Finally I caved to the craving and in what seemed like seconds, had SIX cups wolfed down. Well, once the binge is started its hard to stop so down went a tapioca pudding as well. I'd been so good that day for eating, so really all that binge-food still kept me within my day's calorie allowance, but STILL. Chocolate, sugar and fat.

I immediately felt nauseous, as much from the food as the feelings of guilt and shame. But I wasn't about to do the old finger-down-the-throat thing, so I just went straight to bed. When I woke up in the morning and weighed myself, I was up two pounds. And it was such a miserable feeling, knowing that there went two days of hard work just because of a binge brought on by boredom and loneliness. But you know what? I think in the end it was a good thing because it just made me that much more dedicated, that much more confident that I can power through the next craving and binge impulse. No way in hell am I setting myself back two days just because I'm feeling snacky! That's like two more sessions of hour-long workouts!

So talking about workouts-- I'm still doing the Wii Cardio, at least until my Turbo Jam DVDs get here (should be one more week!). I really like it because it shows how many calories are burned for each workout routine. I am seeing great results in my arms and upper back. And I really think I could kick someone's ass if I had to. I know all the different punches (jab, cross, hook, upper, body shots, etc) and how to execute them properly. I've been waking up an hour earlier than usual so I can do the workout before anyone else wakes up. Its just too hard to fit in the time during the day; Ryder is a maniac and requires constant supervision (right Mom?) and I have too many other things to get done during his nap time. And the morning just works for me. Its quiet, there's noone about watching me, when I'm done I wake up the boys and go about the morning routine. You're riding the exercise-adrenaline high for a good hour afterwards, you feel so good about yourself. Plus, you are more likely to stick with the diet and water routine throughout the day if you know you've already done the hardest part of the WLJ in the morning.

I actually just read in a fitness magazine that the best way to lose weight around your middle is not through stomach crunches or sit-ups, but through a cardio routine. Sure, crunches and sit-ups will strengthen your abs but they won't do anything about all the fat surrounding them. That's where cardio comes in. Active fat burning. So that made me happy to hear. I hate crunches! Haha. I also read that to see a loss of 1-2 pounds a week, you need to decrease your caloric intake by 250 a day. That can be done by eating 250 calories less; exercising 125 calories off and eating 125 less; or exercising 250 calories off. I have restricted my diet from god-knows-how-many-calories before, to 1000-or-less now, per day; and burning between 200-300 calories per day. That's why I'm seeing such great results. And just wait till I start Turbo Jammin'! The website said one hour of TJ burns a thousand calories! Holy cow. I am going to be ripped.

New Year, new body

After learning that my BFF Christine lost a combined total of 80 freaking pounds, I've been inspired. How did she do it, you ask? Well, the little witch did it the old-fashioned way, dieting and exercise. *sigh* There's never an easy way is there? She now wears a size jean that I used to wear before I had Gunnar. Good on ya Chrissy!! I am so happy and excited for her. She said she always thought her body shape was a rectangle, only to discover that she does indeed have a waist, and a fairly muscular one too! It goes to show you that you may think you are predisposed to look a certain way, but your body can surprise you with its potential.

Chris used a series of workout videos called Turbo Jam (which I just ordered today!) and she did an hour, religiously, every day for four months. Every. Day. I am sooo in awe of her. She continues to do this and so it will be interesting to see how much her body continues to change.

So now I am on my own weight-loss journey.

The kids got a Wii for Christmas and one of the games that came with it is this Gold's Gym Cardio Workout, basically a boxing game. It teaches you the basic punches and moves and you work your way through a series of increasingly harder and more complex workouts. The first time I played I lost track of time (that's how fun it is, srsly) and overdid it, played for an hour and a half, and the next day the muscles of my entire back, arms and shoulders were clenched rock-hard. Serious pain and agony. That's how it is with me though, I do a workout, my muscles protest for a few days after, then never again. So I had to wait three days for my back and arm muscles to relax and unclench (hubs and the boys mocked me mercilessly) and then it was back to the game. (Honestly, it was so bad that I couldn't even push down the soap dispenser. I know. You see why they were mocking me.)

And how obsessed I am. Watch the video above and you'll see what its like. When I first start out my shins and calves get a little achy, but after about 20 minutes I reach this zone where my entire body is engaged in what I'm doing, I'm breathing hard and sweating but I don't feel sore or tired. Its amazing, its like I could continue for hours and hours. And in fact, today I was doing so good I kept unlocking new workouts so of course I had to then try them out, and Ty finally said to me, "Uh, you realize you've been doing that TWO HOURS now? You maybe want to come change Ryd's diaper and help feed them lunch?"

So my plan for the new year is to continue on with Gold's Gym Cardio, doing a little bit every day, at least until my Turbo Jam gets here. With Christine as my inspiration, I am so motivated and truly excited to see what happens.

Mom or Amber, you guys ever want to come over and Gold's Gym or Turbo Jam it up with me, feel free! We could call ourselves the "Bulging Bridal Party", even though I'm the only one of us bulging at the moment, haha. (You know that show, Bulging Brides?)

So here's to a New Year, and a New Body!!

ACK! Omg! *cough*gag*

We took the kids out for a bike ride last night, right before the big storm hit. We went all the way down the road to the far-away playground, let the kids run wild at the park while we sat and watched, then made the long trek back home up the hill. As I was coasting down the hill towards home (letting my limp-noodle legs take a rest after lugging the carrier up that damn hill), I had my mouth open, taking deep breaths from the exertion.

All of a sudden, a friggin' bug flew right in my mouth and landed on the back of my throat! I immediately brought the bike to a screeching halt and made a flying jump into the ditch before I'd even fully stopped. At that point, I wasn't even thinking about poor Ryder in the carrier behind me; all I could think of was the bug stuck in the back of my throat, wiggling around and trying to flap its wings.

So there I was, in the ditch, bent over, dry heaving and choking and gagging. Hubs and the kids had stopped to see what the commotion was about (Lena's bike had come to a sudden stop when she rammed right into the back of the carrier, oops! Sorry, Lena!). They were all laughing hilariously at me as I gagged and coughed and puked the bug out.

And to add insult to injury, we weren't even close to home. So I had to haul my gasping body back onto the bike and lug the carrier back all that way. I was dying to take a full lungful of breath, but what with my sinus situation I couldn't breathe fully through my nose, and since I'd just learned the hard way I couldn't breathe through my open mouth, I had to heave and strain for a breath with my lips pursed open the tiniest bit.

I'm sure I looked like an idiot, definitely felt like one.

I'm giving myself a pat on the back right now

I'm kinda proud of myself today. Not only did I get my lazy ass in gear this morning and do my workout, but... I took the kids to the park today. And why is that such a big deal, you ask? Because I rode my bike to the park with both kidlets in the carrier behind me (so that's about 75 pounds extra weight I was haulin') but.... I went to the park by the cop shop! And it only took me 10 minutes to bike there! For those of you familiar with the layout of Sylvan, and where my house is, you know that's like, what... six kilometres? Maybe more, maybe less -- I'm so bad at figuring out distances.

I just can't believe I did it in 10 minutes! I must've been bookin'er! I debated wearing my bike helmet (I look like SUCH a dork) but its a good thing I did because not even a minute into riding, a cop drove by! See, that's why I always trust my gut instinct.

We had such a fun time at the park. Oh, except for when Lena took off her rubber boots and refused to put them back on, so all the other moms thought I was a horrible parent, letting my kid run around in the wet sand with only socks on. What a stubborn creature she is. Ryder loves slides but the only slide there is one of those high ones. You should've seen his face as he was sliding down -- head first, because Lena helped him up there then just pushed him down the slide! -- it was like part pure terror, part exhilaration, part WTF?! Haha. At one point, I was off gathering pinecones under a tree and when I turned around I noticed both kids crouched down, playing with something in the grass. Turned out it was a pile of tiny rabbit turds (or some small-ish animal). And before I could race over there in time, yep, you guessed it. Ryder shoved a handful into his mouth, thinking they were Easter chocolate eggs. BLECH!! Poor kid. Yet another comical face he made, What the hell did I just put in my mouth?! Haha. And of course, being the brainless mom I am, I didn't bring any wipes or kleenexes or anything with me, to wipe off his face and clear the shit out of his mouth. So I used his shirt. Oh yeah, those moms were glaring at me.

But get this. There was a mom that showed up with a little boy and a baby. And the baby had no socks or shoes on! He had pants and a thick wooly hoody, but no frickin' socks, just bare feet! And she was totally nonchalant about it! I mean, sure it was sunny out, but in no way could you consider it a 'warm' day - the wind was so cold. I was horrified, and kept staring at the poor kids feet. She caught me looking and made a half-hearted little rub of his feet. Then she sat down on the wooden edge of the playground and stood her little baby up on his feet between her legs, with his bare feet in the cold wet sand! And there was a little patch of snow by his feet and his tiny toes kept touching the snow. And she was completely oblivious! I was so furious! Finally she must've felt the waves of rage coming off me and gathered up her kids and left. What a dumb b*tch! At least the other mom's opinions of me were raised like a 100% after she showed up.

So the ride back home was interesting. Took me 15 minutes that time, mainly because I was sooo friggin' exhausted AND the wind was blowing like 100 kph and it was blowing against me. Even coming down the home stretch, 60 Street, when I finally made it up the hill and thought, "Yes!! Now my lazy ass can just coast down the hill!" but no. The wind was so strong that I had to pedal downhill. I'm sure if I would've stopped pedalling, my bike would be pushed backwards.

By the time I made it home, my legs were like shaking, limp noodles. Walking became a new experience as my legs were moving all jerkily, wanting to go every which way. I somehow managed to get the bike and carrier back in the garage, haul the kids inside, haul the bag full of water bottles (which I totally forgot to drink) and pinecones inside. I tell ya though, climbing the steps up to the front door, I almost had to physically lift my legs to get them to rise those six inches or so.

Then I had to throw the kids in the bath, get all the sand (and rabbit turds) off them. Put Ryder in bed with a bottle, forced Lena to climb into her own bed for a nap, then I collapsed onto my own bed and I was OUT. Woke up two hours later, and felt wonderful! Seriously, I'm not being sarcastic for once. My legs don't even hurt.

So maybe I'll do that again tomorrow, weather permitting. Gotta admit though, that part of me is wishing for a cold, blustery day. Haha!

She's a Natural

Milena's first gymnastics class was last night. She was so excited! We got there early, so she had some time to get over her initial shyness and make some friends.

Here they all are learning the "stance" - knees bent, arms out. The stance is important because it helps them with balance; whenever they jump or land, they are to do it. Of course, being a class of 3 and 4 year olds, do you think any of them remembered? Haha. Those poor instructors, they have the patience of saints. (See how she's the only one paying attention to the instructor? The rest of the kids are looking for their mommy, not my girl! I can easily say she was the best-behaved kid in the class.)

Here's Lena on the trampoline. I think she was eager to show off her tramp-ing skills. We have one at home and the kids are out there every day (in the warmer months, obvs).

The little girl in the pink, Harley, was one of the first friends Lena made in class. She's a very outgoing little girl, came right up to Lena and said "Come play with me!" and they were off, running around. But as you can tell in this vid and the trampoline one, she's quite... um, what's the word... not hyper or pushy, but kinda both. By the end of the class, Lena had had enough of her. She kept trying to hug Lena and Lena would just shrug her off. The kid's mom was standing right there so I felt bad but hey, I totally understood where Lena was coming from. I'd do the same.

Here they are on the uneven bars. I was quite proud to note that Lena was the only one in her group that could hold onto the bars the longest without letting go, and she didn't need any help lifting her legs up to the bar. Well, I guess in this video she did but all the other times she didn't.

This was at the beginning of class, learning to do the back bridge. I tell ya, Lena's a natural! The boys and I were beaming with pride at how awesome she was.

Time for the balance beam, one of the things Lena was most looking forward to. Her sense of balance is incredible and so natural. I'd be falling down all over that thing. The instructors, probably thinking that they needed to teach the kids in 'baby steps', literally had them doing just that -- baby-stepping on the beam. I know that Lena could run across that thing and not fall, but she did exactly what they taught, took mincing little steps. Being her mother and knowing what she is capable of, I was getting a little frustrated. But that's okay. When class was over and all the kids and parents were leaving, Lena got up on the beam to show Gramma Hag what she could do, and she was strutting back and forth on that thing like a pro. I saw several of the instructors eyeing her. They were probably thinking, "WOW, I want her in my group next time!" She's honestly that good, and I'm not being (that) boastful or biased.

I KNEW this would be her thing!