Well, I did it...

Today was THE DAY, you know, the day the JW was to come over for a "visit" and the day I was going to get the guts to tell her I wasn't interested. And I did it!

She was to come over around 11am and at 9am I decided to call her to say what I had to say over the phone. Because I'm a chicken, and I knew I'd never be able to say all I had to say in person, looking into her big blue eyes. As I was dialing, I repeated my mantra "You can do it, you know what you need to say, you can do it...". It rang and rang and rang -- please, oh please let the answering machine come on.

Sure enough, it did, and I said my spiel, making sure to let her know I would still be a friend if she was interested, seeing as we have a lot in common outside of religion, and that she could come over to visit with her kids whenever and all the kids could play together. I felt real bad for 'leading her on' like that, but oh well.

Then I started worrying that maybe she was out-and-about Christmas shopping (then I realized JW's don't celebrate Christmas), but maybe she was out doing something and was planning to stop here without going home and hearing my message. But 11am came and went and I knew she must have heard it. So I probably broke someone's heart today, but at least I stayed true to my own.