Thursday, November 4, 2010

My secret addiction

I Keep It Real Pictures, Images and Photos


Hello everyone, my name is Beau Kasha and I am an addict. Yes, it is with much shame and embarrassment that I am admitting to you of my deep dark secret addiction to... facebook status updates.

I know, horrifying, isn't it? I keep my secret longings buried deep inside, lest I show to the world how depraved I am and how low I've sunk. And also because I've vowed to never become one of those type of people, who update their status every fifteen minutes and inflict upon the facebook world countless recountings of their boring daily life. (Plus, I don't want to find any of my updates on Lamebook or Failbook. Click the links, you'll see what I mean!)

I find myself at odd times during the day wanting to run to the computer and jot down some random thought, or something one of the kids said, or even an opinion of a talk show. And it hurts, oh it hurts so bad, this self-imposed limitation I've put in place.

And so I've saved it all up, all these pointless random status updates that dance around my head. And I've decided to put them all in a blog post. So in true facebook fashion, here they are...

BeauSaxon Kasha...

has done more laundry in the past two days than in an entire two weeks! How is it that just when you've caught up, suddenly there's a mountain of clothes and towels and bedding and pillows and coats, sitting in front of the washer and you just want to CRY!?

is now a tea-drinker. Haven't drank a drop of coffee in almost two weeks now! Weird, I know. Next thing you know I'll be eating crumpets and talking with a British accent.

thinks its funny how Blue's Clues never goes out of style, for a kid anyway. Its been around now for what, ten years? And its still Ryder's go-to movie. Getting mighty tired of hearing those same old songs... "Blue skidoos, we can too!"

Why do I have three spatulas, four flippers, four wooden spoons, several whisks and tongs, two big spoons, and yet only ONE slotted spoon? And why is it always dirty, in the dishwasher, or just plain LOST when I need to use it?

just found one of my 'toys' on the floor downstairs. Just laying there, by the couch! What the...? It was NOT there ten minutes ago. Good thing I found it before the boys got home from school. (Imagine trying to explain that?) RYDER BRONS KASHA!!!

thinks that if antidepressants work/feel like percocet, then I'm on board. Seriously, the mouth pain is gone, I finally have energy and umption to do stuff, and it just makes me happy! I can see why people get addicted.

just heard three different Motley Crue songs on the radio, all on different stations, playing at the same time, weird! Home Sweet Home, Dr Feelgood, and Girls Girls Girls. Didn't know which one to listen to. Ended up choosing HSH, brings back good memories of a grade 4/5 sleepover at Mandy Lentz's house, listening to it and all us girls singing along.

is really trying to like this Nicorette Inhaler but its hard, for a few reasons: 1) it looks like a tampon, 2) makes the back of my mouth sting, and 3) blowing out smoke is half the fun of smoking! BUT, I will admit that its better than a real cigarette for when I'm driving (kids aren't getting all smoked-out) or in a public situation. Mind you, then I feel like explaining that no, I'm not trying to smoke a tampon.

is wondering how Maury Povich has a better talk-show 'rep' than Jerry Springer -- their shows are almost the same (minus the fights). Same issues (cheating, lie detector tests, are you my child's father?), same smack-talk by the guests, same drama. Must be because he looks so distinguished and respectable.

2 comments:

mama hagar said...

BeauSaxon Mercedes SK. Is this what a facebook status is? OK OK OK (JP style), I realize I too have FACEBOOK but my deepest darkest secret is that I never use it. My last FACEBOOK picture is from three years ago, OFPS, so obviously I never use it. Did you know I have to always refer to my palm pilot first for my FACEBOOK password then, when I’m finally in, I’m at a loss because WTH, it looks different, where’s my home page, what’s with all these streams of info going on and on from so many people, some of who I don’t’ even remember acknowledging as a friend! Why do I care that ten minutes ago someone just updated their profile or so and so are now friends? ANYWAY, I regress so back to you.

In my humble opinion, I beg you to keep these status blurbs an ongoing feature of your blog .. go ahead and keep the laptop on your counter then dash over to it with these types fo random FACEBOOK STATUS thoughts. I mean, honestly, BeauSaxon, reread what you wrote. They act as a mini analog of your life and if saved, they could become a book!

Face it, a FACEBOOK STATUS comment comes and goes, right .. I believe you delete one to insert another and eventually, both are gone forever but these, on a blog, are there forever.

Your hilarious life, summarized every 2-4 weeks, FACEBOOK style, could be a new you. A FAB publication + could actually promote new readers. I, for one, LOVE THIS.

Please continue with this. I’m keeping these and someday I’ll make us rich by publishing a book on YOU called FACEBOOK STATUS UPDATES.

Hag.

WildGirl said...

Haha, okay I will! Glad to hear you like my random ramblings, lol.